Going through the old contacts in my phone, and deleting those that I won’t need in my life anymore. It will leave more space for new people in my life, and it just happened that some people didn’t make the trimmed selection of who stays in, and who gets out. After 3 and a half months a lot of people seem so far away, I’ve also noticed how a lot of these contacts had no purpose, giving me a certain audit, or inventory of my social life, with an added those of introspection.
Once you go through the list, with certain emotional distance, and you start deleting the contacts you won’t be calling, things tend to change perspective, about the trajectory of your life. Yet still my heart was pounding as I was deleting some of these people. I know that their numbers would change over time, and I couldn’t make transatlantic calls to them, so what was the point?
That heart pounding was my fear of drifting into unknown. There needs to be space made in my heart (and contacts book) for some new people. As long as I cling to the old, I am not making enough space for the new. And new is something that is definitively coming.